With the recent fight to end Don’t Ask Don’t Tell (DADT) and Lt Dan Choi’s official discharge from the military last week, Lady VaJayJay decided it might be a great time to share the story of another brave solider who fell victim to DADT.

This is Lady V’s interview with Vic Carmona about his experience regarding to DADT.

Lady V: Tell us your story.

Vic: Where do you want me to start?

Lady V: What made you tell?

Vic: Well to start off I lived in California City, CA in Kern County after graduating from Adult Education in Tehachapi, CA at a young age of 20 I knew I needed direction and the only way out of my little town was to join the armed forces or to commit suicide.

After taking the ASVAB exam and passing it, the second time around I decided to join the US Navy. I enlisted for 4 years. I went to boot camp in Great Lakes which everyone know in boot camp called it “ Great Mistakes” after graduating I was sent to 32^nd Street in San Diego, CA for Mess Specialist School & fire fighting school. Upon completion I chose to get as far away as possible from the United States and was stationed in Yokosuka, Japan on board the USS Hewitt DD966. The first 4 years in Japan was amazing I meet my very first boy friend who was an Aussie no less.

To move the story on at age 24 I decided to come out to my mother.

Lady V: Why did you come out so late?

Vic: I was not comfortable with who I was.

Lady V: How did you come out and what was the experience like coming out?

Vic: Well I came out when my mom called to talk to me when I was still stationed in Japan and at that time the Aussie was my “ friend”. I just hated when my mother called and my boyfriend would pretend that I was in the other bed room and he went to get me. I believe it was on a Sunday when my mother called me and I was in the kitchen and my Aussie handed the phone to me we talked for a little then I said, “ Mom.” I paused then I continued on toe say, “ I have something to tell you.” My Aussie looked at me and made a face as to say NO! He ran in the bath room and shut the door as if my mother was going to jump through the phone and kill the both of us. She didn’t. “ Mom, I’m gay and Aussie is my boyfriend.”

Lady V: What the hell did you mother say??? Tell me girl!

Vic: My mother said that as long as I love someone and as long someone loves me is all that matters and that she hopes that I am happy and that she loves me.

Lady V: Well that’s no fun. Where’s the drama in that. Mothers, you’ve got to love them.

Vic: I do very much so. She is my mother and my father since my father left me when I was 6 years old.

Lady V: So lets move on to the next phase of your life.

Vic: Well after completing my first enlistment I decided to stay in Japan with my Aussie and become and English teacher.

Lady V: So you have a degree?

Vic: Um, no not really.

Lady V: How the hell did you become an English teacher without a degree?

Vic: My Aussie made a fake degree for me then I made a copy of it and I had connections in the Navy and had it stamped as a copy of the original degree.

Lady V: Very cleaver. Just looking at you, I wouldn’t have though you were smart enough to do anything like that.

Vic: Thank you, I guess.

Lady V: So you taught English then where does the extra year come in.

Vic: Well after being out of the military, having my ups and downs of my first relationship (and not being faithful to my boyfriend) we ended the relationship and I moved back home to California City, CA. After only staying with my mother for a short time I decided to reenlist back into the Military for another 4 years.

Lady V: Finally it gets juicy!!

Vic: Once I enlisted I decided once again to go back to Yokosuka, Japan. By then I was in my second tour and my second war.

Lady V: Wait so you’re a Vet?

Vic: Yes, I was in Desert Storm and Desert Strike.

Lady: Did you get any booty in the Navy?

Vic: LOL well they managed to get my booty.

Lady V: Bottom!

Vic: As I was saying. During my second enlist I had been out to myself and I was confident about who I was and who I was about as a person and a human being.

Lady V: So where did it come to you telling someone that you were gay?

Vic: Well this one time as I walked past the chow line to go into the kitchen someone in the line yelled, “ Faggot!” I turned around and everyone was silent. I simply replied, “ Yeah and what are you gonna do about it?” I was a popular gay boy on that ship after that. Everyone wanted a piece of me.

Lady V: Ok honey get your head out of clouds.

Vic: Right, so during the second tour to the Gulf as they say “ What happens at sea stays at sea…..”  So I had my fun with two Sailors.

Lady V: What did you do with them?

Vic: That’s another story lets keep with how I got the boot.

Lady V: Fine, what got you to the point where you felt you needed to tell?

Vic: I felt out of place. I felt as if I was in the closet even though I was already out to everyone.

I decided that I needed to come out and well…I told my supervisor.  After reveling to my immediate supervisor I had to talk to the Executive Officer.  Then after telling him that I am gay, he requested that I write a letter to the Admiral of the base.  Whilst I was writing the letter to the Admiral I felt very empowered and knew what I was doing was something that needed to be done. After disclosing my not so secret, secret, “Admitting that I was GAY”,  I was transferred to a military jail for 30 days in Japan then from there I met others that also were being kicked out for the same reason.

After my 30 days I was transferred to 32^nd Street San Diego, CA for my final extraction from the military. As they went over my paper work I noticed that my evaluation was dropped from 3.8 to 1.8.  The administrative guy looked over my paper work and noticed that I’ve never gotten in trouble and I was always a 3.8- 3.6 sailor and 4.0 being the highest score you could get at the time. He increased my evaluation to 2.8 and I was able to keep my benefits.

The first thing that came to my head was “ FAMILY”! He was either taking care of me or he was just a good guy with a good heart.

Lady V: Well that was a pretty damn boring story. Um you got anything else to say?

Vic: Well now in my free time I have gotten heavily involved in activism for over a year now.

Lady V: How are you involved?

Vic: Well I am a Drag queen activist.

Lady V: Oh wow just like me!

Vic: Well actually Lady V, Vic is Lady VaJayJay you stupid bitch!  So I’m telling my story so you will all HELP  ME sM*A*S*H  DADT! We should have rights as the straight people do damn it! I’m a human being and I deserve that right and respect!

I’ve fought in two wars for your rights. What about mine?

ABOUT LADY VAJAYJAY:

Currently you can see Lady VaJayJay at Hamburger Mary’s in Long Beach, Adele’s at The San Clemente Inn, Hamburger Mary’s in WEHO starting September, at many fundraising events through out Orange County and LA county and at OC Pride on August 14, 2010